Anyone who has tried to engage a child in conversation after school knows the inconsistencies that can occur when trying to elicit information about the school day. Oftentimes one-word yes-or no-answers are the most we can get from our inquiry or better yet, repeated “I don’t know” answers. It’s not that children don’t want to tell us about their school day or the activities they participate in, I believe it’s typically because they don’t know how to express themselves or collect their thoughts after a busy day. 

The next time you want to inquire about your child’s day, here are two things to consider: 

1.)    Timing: Bombarding our children with questions as soon as they get in the car after school or as soon as they walk in the door after an extra-curricular activity is not the best timing. Allowing them to have time to decompress, relax, and process their day are good strategies to prep them for engagement. During dinner time or maybe during the bedtime routine (when a lot of children are stalling for extra wake hours) are good times to get them engaged in conversation. 

2.)    Question Types: Being creative with how you ask your child questions will help them process their thoughts and give you more specific answers. Try not to ask yes or no questions because that’s probably all you will get. Instead, ask questions that will require them to give details in their answers. Below is a list of creative questions that will help prompt your children and help you get full engagement during your next after school conversation! Just pick a few to start the conversation and you will find natural follow-up questions that will present themselves. 

CREATIVE CONVERSATION STARTERS

What was the best part of your day? 

Do you wish there was something you could change about your school day? 

Did anything make you laugh today? 

How was your teacher feeling today? 

What’s one thing you did really well today? 

Who did you sit next to in the lunchroom? 

Did anything out of the ordinary happen today? 

Who did you play with at recess? 

Did you help anyone at school today?

What magic power do you wish you had today at school? How would you use it tomorrow? 

Who was the nicest person to you today? What characteristics make them nice?

Who got in trouble for something today? 

If you could change one thing about your school what would it be? 

If you could change one thing about your classroom or school what would it be? 

Can you teach me something you learned today? 

Was there anything that you didn’t understand in class today? 

Did anything make you sad today? 

Did your teacher read from a book today? 

Tell me something nice that you did for someone today. 

What did you eat for lunch today?